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Sports fans, repent: the end is near



Wow, how many of these are sending you to the Special Hell?
I never made it past "sports fan". :-D
(Can I make Purgatory if it's only NCAA basketball? I've forsworn the NBA this playoff season!)

You've got to love that "Evolutionists" is right next to "Child Molesters". Gives you that warm, fuzzy feeling, don't it?
What is an evolutionist? Someone who subscribes to Darwinian theory? Who teaches "the" theory of evolution in schools? Who evolved? I think they've got me in any case. ;-)

Edit, 11:55 CDT Thu 19 May 2005: I'm told the above sign, originally posted by polarbear1986, was displayed on the campus of the University of Tennessee (probably Memphis). Does anyone have any further context (e.g., was it from a rally or just an individual protestor)?

--
Banazir

Comments

( 117 comments — Leave a comment )
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thanatos_kalos
May. 20th, 2005 01:39 am (UTC)
people who make signs like that need to be sterilised and prevented from communicating their narrow-mindedness to anyone else.
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 01:42 am (UTC)
Narrow-mindedness is an MTD
But you see, narrow-mindedness is a Memetically Transmitted Disease - so unless you are advocating a lobotomy of some sort...

--
Banazir
Re: Narrow-mindedness is an MTD - thanatos_kalos - May. 20th, 2005 01:45 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: Narrow-mindedness is an MTD - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 02:20 am (UTC) - Expand
lilfrankel
May. 20th, 2005 01:39 am (UTC)
I saw one such sign recently on the UF campus that began a similar list with Democrats and later continued with Welfare Mothers. It was... sad to say the least.
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 01:51 am (UTC)
A matter of degree
I think once you cross certain ideological mileposts, such as turning the theory of evolution into a doctrinal issue, the lines are drawn.

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Banazir
Re: A matter of degree - neadods - May. 20th, 2005 02:44 pm (UTC) - Expand
masteralida
May. 20th, 2005 01:43 am (UTC)
*shakes head* Some people's children.....
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 01:55 am (UTC)
LOL, Tatsuya Ishida knew it all
Nice icon...

--
Banazir
jasonwert
May. 20th, 2005 01:44 am (UTC)
Wow, most of the groups on that list would make for one hell of a party! Unless I'm wrong I also noticed that murderers aren't on that list. Interesting...
masteralida
May. 20th, 2005 01:51 am (UTC)
Murderers are okay, as long as they aren't hypocritical, evolutionish masturbators ;)
That's an oxymoron! - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 01:56 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - grain_king - May. 20th, 2005 05:09 pm (UTC) - Expand
Ick - banazir - May. 22nd, 2005 05:27 am (UTC) - Expand
Oh, lots of wrongdoers aren't - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 02:10 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: Oh, lots of wrongdoers aren't - jasonwert - May. 20th, 2005 02:24 am (UTC) - Expand
Twisted meanings - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 03:17 am (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 01:53 am (UTC)
Re: Atheists! Liars! Gamblers! Evolutionists! Hypocrites!!
See, the thing is, they needed a list that was inclusive enough to cover themselves. ;-)

And I. LOVE. That. Icon!
*becomes your iMurdoch*

--
Banazir
(Deleted comment)
(Deleted comment)
(Deleted comment)
I pity the foo' who don't thank Jereeza! - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 03:46 pm (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
Deep in the heart of Texas - banazir - May. 22nd, 2005 05:28 am (UTC) - Expand
artoni
May. 20th, 2005 02:01 am (UTC)
Why do I have the feeling the person making that sign used a thesaurus?
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 02:12 am (UTC)
Force-choking conductors
Vader looks like he's conducting an orhestra! *applause*

I think Force-use falls under the rubric of "psychic" if it cannot be mistaken for witchcraft. :-D

--
Banazir
Re: Force-choking conductors - artoni - May. 20th, 2005 02:15 am (UTC) - Expand
zerovector
May. 20th, 2005 02:02 am (UTC)
Nine.
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 02:13 am (UTC)
LOL!
OK, there's at least one person on my friends list who has tied you.

--
Banazir
Re: LOL! - yahvah - May. 20th, 2005 02:14 am (UTC) - Expand
Now, now... - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 02:21 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: Now, now... - yahvah - May. 20th, 2005 02:31 am (UTC) - Expand
zengeneral
May. 20th, 2005 02:25 am (UTC)
hey, 17, I got VIP access to hell
Drunkards (maybe)
Liars (to women)
Thieves (when I was younger)
Blasphemer (um, Church of Jeff)
Money-Lover (oh I do love money)
Pagans (I am a non practicing buddist)
Prositutes (well... I do love whores)
Witches (well, warlock, I did devil worshiping when I was a kid because christianity was scary)
Atheist (well, after satanism, I realized the third option)
Gamblers (yep)
Porn-Lovers (definately)
Whoremongers (see above)
Evolutionist (to a point)
Lesbian (I am a women trapped in a man's body that is also a lesbian)
Fornicators (Some years ago, with a whore)
Masturbators (well, I am partially blind)
Pyschics (I do see visions)



Anyway, the only real problem is sports fans. If these are the most wanted, then hell is a great fucking party...
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 02:48 am (UTC)
Bwaha, you have to share hell with ME!
Anyway, the only real problem is sports fans.
*snerk*

If these are the most wanted, then hell is a great fucking party...
Please comment on the hellfire!

I find it amusing that this banner gets me 15 replies while nobody gives a crap about tmehlinger's free massforge render farm. :-D
(BTW: Opterons?)

--
Banazir
Re: Bwaha, you have to share hell with ME! - zengeneral - May. 20th, 2005 05:21 am (UTC) - Expand
Harnessing the power of HELLFIRE since 2005 - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 05:26 am (UTC) - Expand
burkhardt
May. 20th, 2005 02:34 am (UTC)
11 though some of them are things I do try to avoid (lying and such), and I did lump agnostics in with atheists I'm doubting the creator of that list would see the difference.
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 02:45 am (UTC)
I'll see your fuzzy kitten
And raise you a qyoot pose!

I did lump agnostics in with atheists I'm doubting the creator of that list would see the difference.
I'm doubting they would see a lot of differences. :-/

--
Banazir
Re: I'll see your fuzzy kitten - burkhardt - May. 20th, 2005 03:00 am (UTC) - Expand
Woah! - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 03:11 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: Woah! - burkhardt - May. 20th, 2005 03:13 am (UTC) - Expand
Fremen kitten! - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 03:15 am (UTC) - Expand
penguinicity
May. 20th, 2005 02:45 am (UTC)
Heh, evolutionists are damned, but geology is OK...

The sad thing is that's a professional looking banner. Someone spent some money to get it made.
gondhir
May. 20th, 2005 03:13 am (UTC)
Lovers of money?
Well, they spent it... - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 03:16 am (UTC) - Expand
maru_maru
May. 20th, 2005 02:51 am (UTC)
I have about 6 I'm apparently going to hell for.

Not including sports fan.
maru_maru
May. 20th, 2005 02:52 am (UTC)
oh wait, seven. I somehow missed "money-lover" :)
Heh - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 03:06 am (UTC) - Expand
There are sports in hell! - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 02:59 am (UTC) - Expand
penfold_x
May. 20th, 2005 02:54 am (UTC)
Sports fans? I'd love to see the complimentary verse for that assertion.
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 03:14 am (UTC)
Good question
I don't know, but through a bit of cursory web research I came across this anti-Title IX article and a lot of bemoaning of "sports widowhood".

It seems to be a short leap to "should preachers preach against sports?"

(All are hits on "Bible against sports".)

--
Banazir
Re: Good question - sui_degeneris - May. 20th, 2005 03:49 am (UTC) - Expand
inaniac
May. 20th, 2005 02:57 am (UTC)
hahaha ... I though liars was LJers

crawls back under her rock
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 03:00 am (UTC)
Hell's most wanted LJers
hahaha ... I though liars was LJers
crawls back under her rock

ROFLMAO!!

LJers are the rejects! :-D

--
Banazir
Re: Hell's most wanted LJers - inaniac - May. 20th, 2005 03:39 am (UTC) - Expand
The Sixth Circle of Hell - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 03:47 am (UTC) - Expand
celandineb
May. 20th, 2005 03:18 am (UTC)
Hey, with "hypocrites" on the list, not to mention "liars," I'm willing to bet that those who created it will be seen in the flames they predict for others.

Um, 16 I think here... if one allows a certain amount of breadth in interpretation. However, since I don't believe in hell, I'm unlikely to be seen there. Only those who believe get to participate in that game. :-)
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 03:36 am (UTC)
Exclusivity
Hey, with "hypocrites" on the list, not to mention "liars," I'm willing to bet that those who created it will be seen in the flames they predict for others.
Very likely, yes.
Unless the list is a load of baloney, of course, which is even more likely.

Um, 16 I think here... if one allows a certain amount of breadth in interpretation. However, since I don't believe in hell, I'm unlikely to be seen there. Only those who believe get to participate in that game. :-)
Well, only those who believe believe they get to participate. But at any rate, the gates of heaven are pretty turned narrow in the above scenario, and would probably exclude most of the people whose heads we see the tops of in that photo. :-D

--
Banazir
yodge
May. 20th, 2005 04:25 am (UTC)
Oy.

("Sports fans"!?? Bwahaha!) what ARE these people?

I thought the big sins highlighted by Jesus were, y'know, heart stuff. Laziness. Gossip. Hate. Selfishness. PRIDE.

grrr.
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 04:56 am (UTC)
There's sin and then there's sin
Oy.
("Sports fans"!?? Bwahaha!) what ARE these people?

I dunno - I saw this in a community where it was cited as a repost of a photo that appeared in the_witches last fall. Apparently it was on the campus of the University of Tennessee (if it's Knoxville, that's where Banamum got her degree).

I thought the big sins highlighted by Jesus were, y'know, heart stuff. Laziness. Gossip. Hate. Selfishness. PRIDE.
grrr.

Zigzackly. That's what I remembered, ataleast.
Interestingly, some of those dknot seem to have made the list.

Excellent choice of icon, too. I suspected you were going to use that one. (Psaaaag! Psychic!!)

--
Banazir
natsunami
May. 20th, 2005 04:42 am (UTC)
The same signs were being toted around at the Prince concerts I attended last summer. We Prince fans are oh so sinful.
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 05:06 am (UTC)
The Artist Formerly Known as [Androgyny]
The same signs were being toted around at the Prince concerts I attended last summer. We Prince fans are oh so sinful.
C'mon! His music's roots are in burlesque!

*cues "Thieves in the Temple"*

--
Banazir
mrowe
May. 20th, 2005 04:52 am (UTC)
Heh... Well at least we know where the better party is going to be...
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 05:07 am (UTC)
Hello Cthulhu!
I get a chuckle every time I see that.

--
Banazir
(no subject) - cesario - May. 20th, 2005 06:16 pm (UTC) - Expand
OK, you are added - banazir - May. 22nd, 2005 05:30 am (UTC) - Expand
kathhazel
May. 20th, 2005 07:45 am (UTC)
time for a joke :)
After he dies Joe the Pagan spots a flight of stairs winding up into the clouds. When he gets to the top he is faced by St Peter and the pearly gates. After a brief discussion Joe is told he isn't on the list and can't come in, St Peter waves an arm and a trapdoor opens with a set of narrow steps leading down. Sp Peter points to them and says, 'It's that way for you'

With a small amount of aprehension Joe sets off down the steps. When he reaches the bottom he is surprised to find himself in rolling green hills and dales, he is then met by a tall, dark gentleman who introduces himself as Nick.

Joe, being rather confused, explains what has happened and that he is a Pagan and looking for the Summerlands. Nick smiles and says,'That's fine. You see that path that goes through those woods.....follow that round the hill and you will find the rest of the pagans having a bit of a party, just past the stone circle on the left. You can't get lost.' Joe thanks him and turns to set off.

Just then a hole opens in the sky and a body falls through. As it nears the ground a gaping hole appears, flames shoot out and the body falls into them, screaming as the ground closes over it.

Joe turns back to Nick with a look of horror on his face and says,'That isn't going to happen to me is it?', backing away warily.

'Oh no, that's just the Christians....we've tried talking to them and we've even given some of them a guided tour....but they just won't have it.'

banazir
May. 20th, 2005 09:57 am (UTC)
Joe the Pagan
Heh - hell is what you make of it, eh?

--
Banazir
Re: time for a joke :) - lots42 - May. 20th, 2005 12:06 pm (UTC) - Expand
Welcome! - banazir - May. 22nd, 2005 05:24 am (UTC) - Expand
drbear
May. 20th, 2005 10:52 am (UTC)
I must be in trouble - I'm a sports fan and the Whoremongers are my favorite team.
banazir
May. 22nd, 2005 05:31 am (UTC)
Whoremongers?
What city? :-)

--
Banazir
cesario
May. 20th, 2005 11:00 am (UTC)
I may be able to offer some context to the insane horribleness of it all, although I doubt it will make anyone feel better. This past December I graduated from a school quite near UT. There is a group of preaching...people who travel from school system to school system, stand in the quad or the equivalent public place, and preach at the top of their lungs, usually wearing tshirts with slogans or carrying banners, etc. It used to be just the one man, but lately he's been coming with his sons in law and their badly dressed dumpy women and their terrified looking small children. It's sort of a tradition to gather round them in a circle, ask questions, and laugh uproariously at the answers. Last time they came it was really hot so I went into the cafeteria and got them some water. They were very polite and receptive to the courtesy, so they have to be at least partially human.
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 03:43 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the background
I appreciate the confirmation, and thank you for showing courtesy to a person who I'm guessing you wholly disagreed with.

Is it all right with you if I add you, BTW?
Feel free to add me back, if you like.

--
Banazir
Re: Thanks for the background - cesario - May. 20th, 2005 06:14 pm (UTC) - Expand
lots42
May. 20th, 2005 12:04 pm (UTC)
I love it. According to the sign, the person holding it is going to hell re: 'hypocrites'
banazir
May. 22nd, 2005 05:31 am (UTC)
No kidding
That is a great icon, BTW.

--
Banazir
(Deleted comment)
banazir
May. 22nd, 2005 05:30 am (UTC)
This is true
Does "torificus" have anything to do with Tori Amos?

--
Banazir
(Deleted comment)
Yay Tori - banazir - May. 22nd, 2005 05:40 am (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
twinbee
May. 20th, 2005 01:15 pm (UTC)
Is that good ole "God hated fags" Fred Phelps? What will those wacky fundamentalists do next episode?
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 03:45 pm (UTC)
Fred Phelps
Is that good ole "God hated fags" Fred Phelps? What will those wacky fundamentalists do next episode?
Thankfully, no; see this. It may not be much better, but I haven't heard that these people advocate hate crime. (They may espouse intolerance and hate, of course, which is very often tantamount to condoning hate crime.)

"hated"? Last I heard, Phelps uses the present tense. :-/

--
Banazir
Re: Fred Phelps - twinbee - May. 20th, 2005 06:18 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Fred Phelps - banazir - May. 22nd, 2005 05:26 am (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 03:41 pm (UTC)
Evolutionists: Hell's Most Wanted
You can see "evolutionists" being hell's most wanted?

Drunkards? Masturbators?

There are certain behaviors such as drug abuse (for which alcohol abuse and pot-smoking are singled out) that are self-destructive, to be sure, but I think the sign-makers have definitely lost their way in associating them with evils of character punishable by hell. Unless the implication is that all evils of character are (cf. "the wages of sin is death"), but then, they wouldn't need a specific list on that placard.

The whole idea that all abuse of alcohol is indicative of the same flaw of character (which flies in the face of genetics and sociology both, not to mention ethics), is a pet peeve of mine. More so that differences of knowledge and inquiry such as science "versus" faith (e.g., "did evolution occur?") can be twisted into doctrinal issues (e.g., "did God create?"). Some of these are deliberate straw men and worthy only of disregard.

--
Banazir
(Deleted comment)
Re: Evolutionists: Hell's Most Wanted - banazir - May. 20th, 2005 04:18 pm (UTC) - Expand
lemonly
May. 20th, 2005 01:40 pm (UTC)
lol :)
i think the definition of "evolutionist" should be anyone who has evolved :) that's great :) i saw the picture and was afraid it was fred phelps and local...but then i guess it could still be phelps...i love too that it says homosexuals AND lesbians...do you suppose to that the sign holder masturbates or fornicates...wouldn't that make them a hypocrite...

crazy...
banazir
May. 20th, 2005 04:29 pm (UTC)
Signs
lol :)
i think the definition of "evolutionist" should be anyone who has evolved :) that's great :)

Well, yes, particularly since I don't think any soi-disant "Creationist" would object to being called one who was created. :-)

i saw the picture and was afraid it was fred phelps and local...but then i guess it could still be phelps...
It wasn't - from cesario's description above, it's a local itinerant preacher. Phelps, unfortunately, has a much larger following via Westboro Baptist Church.

i love too that it says homosexuals AND lesbians...
I was just telling a friend yesterday that that's no fair! It gives females a bonus!

do you suppose to that the sign holder masturbates or fornicates...wouldn't that make them a hypocrite...
Hrm, yes, perhaps, but it's hard to hold a sign while one is masturbating. Steadily, anyway.

--
Banazir
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