Banazîr the Jedi Hobbit (banazir) wrote,
Banazîr the Jedi Hobbit
banazir

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Lifting Lemma for The zengeneral World Conquest Plan

I fear for the future of humanity while the House of KDD exists.
    -masaga

This idea is due to masaga: another global conquest plan.

  • Collect genetic material for multiple somatic-cell clones of zengeneral.

  • Let zengeneral work on his Church of Jeff; meanwhile, develop a portable plasma weapon.

  • Should the original zengeneral die, restore from the clone a la Data, post-Nemesis. To ensure the Galois/Keats effect, inform him that he has 7 years to live, regardless of telomeric age.

  • Repeat as needed.


From neonhummingbird by way of butterflykiki:

Twenty-six Questions Meme

1. What's on your bedside table?
A lava lamp, the cognitive science book Speaking Minds, and a copy of the latest web design, graphics, or mobile computing magazine.
Occasionally, a copy of Scientific American.

2. What's the geekiest part of your music collection?
Weird Al, Weird Al, Weird Al.
Polka Party and Dare To Be Stupid.
I have a little Dr. Demento, too.

3. What do you eat/drink when you raid your fridge at night?
Ice cream (mint chocolate chip, butter pecan, black cherry), shortbread cookies.
Diet Vanilla Pepsi or Diet Dr. Pepper.
An occasional glass of warm milk.

4. What is your secret guaranteed weeping film?
I don't have a weeping film, per se. I think I got a little sniffly at the ending of The Joy Luck Club and was much moved by Murder in The First.

5. If you could have plastic surgery, what would you have done?
Uhh... can't think of anything.
Laser eye surgery, yesh. Cosmetic surgery? Nah.

6. Do you have a completely irrational fear?
None that I can think of. I am not very good with heights (especially tree-climbing and free-climbing), but it isn't acrophobia that I know of.

7. What is the little physical habit that gives away your insecure moments?
Hrm, have to think about this...
I stick close to people and sometimes get in their way.

8. Do you ever have to beg?
No.

9. Do you have too many love interests?
Nope!
The more, the merrierThere aren't enough Eskimos in Kansas.

10. Do you know anyone famous?
To people in CS/IT: The Mouth of Gateswe (my mom's kid brother) and about 200 other pretty well-known computer scientists.

11. Describe your bed.
Queen-size (because a king-size wouldn't fit through my stairway), light pastel green cotton percale sheets, dark red comforter, forest green bedspread. Two pillows.

12. Spontaneous or plan?
Spontaneous, I wish.
Plan, I do.

13. Who should play you in a movie about your life?
No idea. I'd say myself, but it sounds immodest.
Garrett Wong? *shrug*

14. Do you know how to play poker?
Five-card draw, stud: Yes.
Texas Hold'Em: Theoretically, kindasorta.
Chinese five-card stud: I did, but I can't remember.

15. What do you carry with you at all times?
Almost always: My cell phone (Samsung VGA1000 picture phone for Sprint PCs, 2003 model) and my PocketPC, Sting (COMPAQ iPAQ H3635, 2001 model). Always always: my wallet.

16. How do you drive?
I drive conservatively in cities, and I lock cruise control in at about 70-80mph on interstate highways.

17. What do you miss most about being little?
1980's computers (well, I can still get those).
Getting compliments for having a good imagination or memory.
Having time to read science fiction and fantasy.

18. Are you happy with your given name?
Chinese? Yes.
English? The full name, yes; nicks, yes and no (short version, no; diminutive, yes).

19. What color is your bedroom?
White and brown.

20. What was the last song to which you were listening?
Before the fragment of the What I Like About You theme song on TV?
Soft Cell - "Tainted Love" (radio mix on FM 103.5)

21. Have you ever been in a school play?
Heck, yes. I was Balthazar (one of the Three Magi) in the 3rd grade Nativity pageant, OK? You happy now?!

22. Have you ever been in love?
Yes.

23. Do you like yourself and believe in yourself?
Usually, yes.

24. Have you ever done any illegal drugs?
No. (I've never lived in a place where alcohol is illegal.)

25. Do you think you're cute?
Umm... wlokay, yee.

26. Do you consider yourself a nice person?
Yes.


Also from neonhummingbird via butterflykiki and havocthecat:

Reader Meme

Hardback or paperback?
Paperback for general fiction, hardback for new titles, omnibus volumes, and nonfiction.

Highlight or underline?
Gah. Neither.

Lewis or Tolkien?
Hrm, tough one (no, really). Tolkien.

E.B. White or A.A. Milne?
Another toss-up. A. A. Milne.

T.S. Eliot or e.e. cummings?
T.S. Eliot.

Stephen King or Dean Koontz?
Stephen King, but I haven't read any books by Dean Koontz.

Barnes & Noble or Borders?
Either works! sui_degeneris can tell you how I long for just one of them here in the Little Apple. When I was a chambana resident like ellie_desu and havocthecat of yore... ah, but those were halcyon days. :-/
I agree with butterflykiki and havocthecat that used bookstores are better. And Reiter's. And Half.com. All else is commentaryAmazon.

Fantasy or science fiction?
Both, definitely. Science fiction with a fantasy twist (see my quiz): lost planets, metapsychic powers, the familiar bond. Hard SF can be good, too, if there is a literary twist cf. hyperion_cantos. Retellings of pulp SF for the "postmodern age": yes, I'm one of the julianmayfans.

Horror or suspense?
Horror. Vampires, and the more historical fiction, the better.

Bookmark or dogear?
Time to reiterate neonhummingbird's response: "Bookmark, don't break the spine, and don't bend the cover. Paperback abuse runs rampant in this country and it's time to take a stand..."

Also, like butterflykiki, I can use anything of the requisite topology as a bookmark: 3.5" floppies are too thick, but CDs and DVDs, papers, loose pages, Post-It notes, coins, paper clips, disk sleeves, napkins, paper towels, catalogs, bills (yes, bills), renewal slips, and especially magazine subscription and examination copy order forms... the last three of which exacerbate the procrastination, and all of which increase my search time for things in "safe places".

Hemingway or Faulkner?
Hemingway. Haven't read any Faulkner, though my dad did work with a nephew of his.

Fitzgerald or Steinbeck?
I've read maybe a little excerpt of The Grapes of Wrath, so I can't say.

Homer or Plato?
I'm going to suprise you all and say Homer by a wide margin.

Geoffrey Chaucer or Edmund Spenser?
Chaucer. Have never read anything by Spenser.

Pen or pencil?
Pencil, pencil, pencil. Mechanical, large twist-out eraser.
Pens and I don't mix well. I can tolerate fountain pens.

Looseleaf or notepad?
Either, but no spiral binding for me: nice neat adhesive-spine tear out or perforated pads.

Alphabetize?
Almost never. By genre and sometimes in chronological or prioritized order.

Dustjacket: on or off?
Off, carefully stowed.

Novella or epic?
Epic, usually. Novellas if the author has a really self-contained short story-telling style. Orson Scott Card can do it, Michael Swanwick, Neal Stephenson. The Omni anthologies and similar SF compilations have other examples.

John Grisham or Scott Turow?
Neither, though I need to read Grisham.

J.K. Rowling or Lemony Snicket?
J.K. Rowling... holding out for most of the HPs, but who's Lemony Snicket?

John Irving or John Updike?
Neither.

Fiction or non-fiction?
Fiction by preference if we are talking about leisure (extra-professional) reading.
I like nonfiction by authors such as Asimov, Feynman, and Sacks, and borrow books of that ilk from my dad, who prefers nonfiction unless it's, er, very fictional (e.g., really over-the-top wuxia).

Historical biography or historical romance?
Gosh, tough call. Period romance by a slight margin, I guess, but it's iffy. Does Wimsey count? :-D

A few pages per sitting or finish at least a chapter?
At least a chapter, unless I'm busy working, in which case I read a few pages during breaks and then stay up all night to devour the rest of the book.

Short story or creative non-fiction essay?
Short story.

"It was a dark and stormy night" or "Once upon a time"?
Either is good. I'm really split right down the middle on this one, mainly because I like the "gathering storm clouds of the evil sorcerous enemy" genre of fantastic fiction.

Buy or borrow?
Both. Borrow for a one-time reading, but I seldom fail to buy it eventually if I like it and space permits.

Book reviews or word of mouth?
Word of mouth (for fiction).
For nonfiction, if it's techish, come to compscibooks.


--
Banazir
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